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Listening at the Speed of Life

– by C. J. Wade –

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Reminders

Wednesday Wind Down: So Loved

Good Morning, Family!

I hope you’re doing well out there despite severe weather, hate crimes, and illness swirling around us. I pray for you often, so you have an advocate here, OK? OK. Let’s dig into this short stop.

As my excavation and therapy continues, the layers have revealed a rawness I haven’t been able to ignore.

Sometimes I cry and sometimes I’m overwhelmed with frustration. While the rollercoaster is annoying, I am committed to the healing process. Like I told my therapist, now that I’m aware of this hidden suitcase, I’m all in – I’m healing from this one time and one time only.

One of the revelations on this rollercoaster has been that in spite of the valleys, God has always shown me that I am loved.

A note of appreciation from a student
A love note from my mother
A sunset in my favorite colors
A car ride from my sister
A text message saying I love you
A slow walk with my cousin after surgery
A former student calling to check on me
A stranger pushing my car during a snowstorm
A supervisor letting me sit in on an executive meeting
A long hug that was much needed
A kind word on a difficult day
A chance to cry on a friend’s shoulder
A compliment from a cashier
A friend paying for dinner
A road trip full of laughs
A cup of grace when I was wrong

All of these beautiful moments were unsolicited and there are plenty more. I’ll never understand why horrible things happen. Truthfully, I can’t even say that everything is allowed to make us stronger either. I believe some things occur because we make negative decisions. I also believe nothing catches God by surprise. Somehow, some way, there are reminders we are loved through it all.

Photo by Keira Burton on Pexels.com

Consider similar moments in your life. I know the sucky moments are there, but place your pencil on the page and retrace the years. I’m sure you’ll find unsolicited moments of love sprinkled over your life. So, as much as I despised the valleys and felt alone at times, God always said “You are so loved.”

So loved.

The ring of those words has been in my ear for years (and is actually a book in progress), but it radiated such high vibrations one day. I teared up and said “Thank you. I am so loved.” Over and over again, I said those words and they washed over me like a warm water from a rainfall showerhead. At that moment, I didn’t feel forsaken. I felt remembered.

Family, you are so loved. I love you enough to write you on the regular and God loves you enough to send you reminders from various directions. You are not forgotten. You are not forsaken.

I pray you receive every transmitted love message divinely sent to you.

I love you. God loves you. You are so loved.

Peace & Thanks for listening!

Wednesday Wind Down: Remember When

Hey, Sweethearts!

This post is dedicated to the “survivor you.” You know — the part you tucked away because you thought you were done with that season? That you. Right there. We’re going to tap into that person again.

Which person was you?

  • College student with minimal income and a heavy semester course load
  • Single parent trying to stretch a minimum wage check
  • Homeless person avoiding an abusive home
  • Fresh out of school and figuring out how to budget expenses
  • Sick at home and not able to work
  • Laid off from work and working a lower paying job
  • Caregiving for a loved one and trying to balance work demands
Photo by Ketut Subiyanto on Pexels.com

If none of these fit you, fill in the blank with whatever lean state you’ve experienced in your lifetime. Now, let’s revisit some ways you can survive this season too. You can’t be too high and mighty to dig into the following three tips. Ready? Let’s take a quick trip down memory lane.


Survival Reminder Tips

  1. Stretch those meals.
    Remember those ramen noodles? I hope I didn’t make you gag. lol Essentially, you ate within your budget. You made one pizza last two days. You got creative with pasta. You could eat off of $10.00. You knew each restaurant’s deal days. This may be a different time, but you may need to dig into that mindset for a bit. There’s nothing wrong with that. If you have to feed that family on spaghetti, make it happen. When I was an RA in college, I created a study break for my residents by buying about six boxes of kiddie cereal and various types of milk and setting up a cereal bar. Do what you need to do, Sweethearts. Create that magic!
  2. Go outside.
    It’s no secret that when we were younger, we went outside more. Yes, there’s a pandemic out there, but there’s a reason why my grandparents would always tell us to play outside. Remember when you had to walk because you didn’t have a car or you took public transportation to the nearest stop? It expands the mind, strengthens the body, and uplifts the spirit. Take advantage of parks and hiking trails. Those are excellent places to create beautiful memories within social distancing and budgeting parameters. So, explore your city, county, and state!
  3. Sharing is caring.
    Back in the day, my college friends and I shared meals. Between three of us, we would conjure up a protein and some sides. This may be a little interesting with the virus, but it won’t hurt to buy a couple of frozen dinners or cans of soup for your neighbor. If you’re that neighbor, it won’t hurt to accept the kindness. The more we stay in silos, the more likely we are to die in them. Be careful? Yes. Be caring? Yes again.
Photo by Julia Volk on Pexels.com

I truly believe that COVID-19 has been a great equalizer and everyone has the opportunity to tap into the survival skills that got them through the tough times of yesteryear.

The pandemic won’t last forever. We just have to make it through this chapter. Don’t be afraid to dig deep to see it through. Don’t be afraid to let that “survivor you” float to the surface and do what s/he does best. Then look in the mirror without shame and smile at that awesomeness.

I’m rooting for you!

Peace & Thanks for listening!

Wednesday Wind Down: Starstruck

Hi, Sweethearts!

One of my favorite things to do is stargazing. As a child, I had an astronomy book to help me locate the constellations and understand the galaxies. It was fascinating. I would look outside my window when my mother fell asleep and let my imagination run completely wild. Somewhere in the world, there was another child looking at the same star as me. I was taking a nap on the crescent moon unafraid of heights. I could walk on the clouds.

As an adult, there’s nothing like looking up at the end of the day and realizing how small my problems are. I see the night sky as a midnight blue blanket sprinkled with twinkling promises of God loves for me. I smile every time at the thought of that Truth. Regardless of what is going on in my world, looking up inspires me to keep going.

Though they are far away, they are clear reminders that cause me to stare in awe. They are silently loud. I pray that God’s Light in me is able to be seen for thousands of miles. Onlookers will see me but admire the Father. Admire His Spirit. Honor His Glory.

When you go about your week, I want you to remember that you’re covered. You’re safe in His arms. You are Loved. You are protected. Your problems can only overtake you when you forget those stars. Breathe, look up, and smile every chance you get.

Peace & Thanks for listening!

astronomy dark dawn dusk
Photo by Matheus Bertelli on Pexels.com

Wednesday Wind Down: Let ‘Em Talk

Good Evening, Sweethearts!

As you wind down for the day, I pray this message reaches you with good health in mind, body, and spirit. I can’t wait to share what I heard this week.

One of my favorite athletes is Manny Pacquiao. No, I am not a boxer, but I admire the profession and Manny has earned my respect over the years.

On FOX Sports PBC FACE TO FACE, I watched undefeated Welterweight Keith “One Time” Thurman talk about how excited he will be when he defeats Filipino Senator and Legendary Champion Manny “Pac-man” Pacquiao. Frankly, he was talking a lot of trash with shots of cockiness. Thurman spoke jovially of Pacquiao’s age and career statistics. He said that he studied Manny’s fighting style and described ways he could penetrate his speed. I shook my head at the television while my athlete remained unphased on the screen.

The reason why Pacquiao is on my respect list is that he keeps his priorities straight — no matter what. I love how cool he is under pressure. I love how he keeps the main thing, the main thing – faith, family, then the fight. I appreciate his ability to train hard and serve his country equally hard. I admire his work-life balance. So, as I continued to watch the dialogue, I couldn’t help but notice the dichotomy in demeanor. In the midst of this observation, I heard 3 things that can help us prepare for battles in our lives.

pacquiao-thurman (1)
Courtesy of BoxingScene.com

1. There’s a difference between training to obtain and training to maintain.

Looking at sizzle reels of their training sessions revealed how different they trained.  Thurman’s clip was grizzly. His workouts were aggressive. He explained his rise to fame and his teenage decision to choose boxing over academics. I loved it actually. So much passion at such a young age and still tenacious as ever. Pacquiao’s clip was seasoned and strategic. He looked like wisdom in motion, and I’m not just saying that because he’s my favorite. Their attitudes during exercises were visibly different as well. Thurman kept repeating his goal of being a history maker for bringing down his opponent. Pacquiao never mentioned him. It was like watching a car in the acceleration lane versus on the open road.

2. Let your fight talk for you.

The moderator asked for pre-, during, and post-fight predictions. Pacquiao had little say. His words were light, short, and clear. “I respect every opponent,” he said. When asked how the fight would end, he said that both fighters worked hard and made the fans happy. Thurman? In his best announcer voice, he claimed himself as the champion. Pacquiao smiled.

3. Let your enemy keep talking.

Throughout the entire session, there were opportunities for Pacquiao to retaliate with a fiery response. He let Thurman talk as much as he wanted and only spoke when asked a question by the moderator. His face didn’t flinch. He didn’t smirk. He didn’t grimace. His eyebrows didn’t furrow. He was calm. Even his instinctive blinks were undisturbed. I study communication like coaches study plays. I can’t deny my sentiments — I loved it. I couldn’t tell what he was thinking, but he definitely wasn’t moved.

So, on July 20, 2019, we’ll see words and training in action. Of course, I am #TeamPacquiao all day and regardless of the prediction, his character is a winner in my book. My prayer for us is that we take his lead when faced with situations underneath our royalty. Enemies always have a lot to say. Let your character be just as loud. Now, I’m not saying Thurman doesn’t have good character; I do not know him. What I am saying is stop engaging in every conversation as if you have something to prove. You don’t. Let your work speak for you.

Peace & Thanks for listening!

#bloglikecrazy: Day 18 – Together

Three people. One day. All the feels.

It began with a tutoring appointment with a former student who is determined not to let anything stop her from graduating, including her English paper. I challenged her and she made me laugh. She stepped outside of her essay-writing comfort zone and I helped her see her thoughts on paper. She left the session equipped and excited to keep going. It reminded me of one of my favorite quotes and made me proud to be an educator.

Next, I had lunch with sweet friend from high school. She and I were in band together and I always thought her hair color and freckles were cool. She had a quiet strength that I admired and we became friends quickly. Now that we’re grown, we had grown-folk conversation and it was lovely. We vented, we cried, we laughed. I was proud to be a friend… and her freckles and hair color still rock.

Then, it was time for my cousin’s baby shower which, might I add, was a night time swag affair. Live music, baby shower games, good food and laughs made this shower worth the cold rainy drive. I’m well acquainted with both parents, so it was great to anticipate my new cousin’s arrival. As I helped clean up, the running theme was clear. I was proud to be family.

Afrer all three settings, the word that stuck out was TOGETHER. My former student’s essay challenge wasn’t so mountainous after we met for tutoring. My friend and I didn’t feel alone in our life lessons after lunch. My family’s shower was better because everyone could share the experience. On that day, life was better together. 

Sweethearts, I pray that if you’re feeling lonely and life’s bumps are giving you bruises, that you remember that you are not alone. Lonely and alone are not the same. You can feel lonely in a crowded room. I’ve been there, and wisdom has taught me that you have someone who wants to be better together with you. Be careful, but let her or him in your heart’s circle and watch the healing begin. We were not designed to do life alone. Your problems may not go away quicker, but you’ll be stronger together as the storm passes by.

Peace & Thanks for listening!

#bloglikecrazy: Day 27 – The Mix

Good Day, Good People. Here’s your quick short stop reminder for the week.

You can’t just pick the good parts.

It takes the bitter to make everything sweeter. Let talk cooking for a minute.

Cake ingredients taste separately horrible. Who wants to eat plates of flour, salt, and baking powder? Um, no. Who will eat two servings of delicious cake? Me.

Other scenarios to think about: Salt is often added to chocolate to enhance its flavor in your mouth. Salad dressing needs oil and acid in order to accentuate your leafy greens. Marshmallows balance out with cereal. Sand needs heat to make beautiful glass. Your fresh fruits and vegetables need fertilized dirt to grow. And trust me, there’s nothing sweet about fertilizer.

Now let’s talk life. You can’t just pick the good parts out of people when you choose relationships. There is an ugly part in everyone. It’s part of our organic makeup. After all, we’re dirt ourselves (if you need a reminder, take a bath). Just like you can’t pick out parts of people, you can’t dissect the map of your purpose journey either. There are some rocks, trees, desolate places, and cold nights in the midst of those sunny steps. It doesn’t mean you stop walking. You know the purpose overrides the bad parts. That’s how “all things work together” in Romans 8:28.

Lastly, the Truth of God’s Word may not be the icing to your situation, but It works together just like those cake ingredients. Get some encouragement as you go through The Mix. You’ll be better for every part of it, not just the marshmallows.

Peace & Thanks for listening!

Photo courtesy of the SavorySweetLife.com.

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