Listening at the Speed of Life

– by C. J. Wade –



Resurrect Me – Part 4

Happy Sunday, Family!

The sunshine and wind were working incredibly hard to make me jealous today, but I’m finally off work and able to enjoy some natural goodness. It feels good to look up at the clouds on a soft blue canvas as I write the final installment of this blog series. It’s a short stop (500 words or less), so let’s get into it!

UTR Lesson #4 – I’m always worth the pause.

Before the car wheels rolled to Indianapolis, I had a master plan.

No matter what happened that weekend, I was going to enjoy the hotel’s laundry access and indoor pool.

I packed my swimsuit with anticipation of relaxing after the final show – period. That previous week, I drove to Knoxville and walked a good bit, so my body was screaming for a breather. I also wanted to stretch and exercise in the water to make my joints and muscles happy.

Monday morning came and I had already asked for a late checkout, so a smile swept across my face. The relaxation moment was ripe and I intended to enjoy some quiet bliss before the trek back to Alabama.

I stirred about in preparation and received a phone call from a close friend. We had a rich conversation as I placed my dirty clothes into the machine. Checkout was at 1:00 and it felt so good not to hurry. I was eating it up.

That warm pool was waiting on me.

The Plan: Enjoy the solitude while the laundry did its thing.

No laundry when I get home? Yes, puh-lease.

Just as my aunt and sisterfriend were leaving the pool, I arrived ready to marinate in the quiet. I don’t know how to swim (yet), so I bobbed a little to acclimate. I admired my hands and thighs. The richness of my brown skin against that cream basin was beautiful. I dipped further and let the water hold me up to my ears, inhaling and exhaling when it touched my hair. I felt sweet and safe. I prayed. My people meter went down to a normal level again.

That’s the thing about self-care – it keeps you healthy. That alone makes it non-negotiable.

I know my boundaries and what it takes to maintain them. That day, it was pausing for pool time and admiring God’s fingerprints on me. Being grateful for how far we had come together. Acknowledging there was more work to do and I was equipped to do it when I returned. It was being gentle with myself a couple of hours before checkout.

It was remembering that I can insert self-care on the road. I’m always worth the pause.

Please remember to do the same. Regardless of your schedule, put yourself on it. You may be surprised who you’ll find in the pause.

Speaking of pauses, that’s it for this month! Time to switch to podcast mode, so listen to Season 4 in May!

I love y’all. Take care of you.

Peace & Thanks for listening!

Resurrect Me – Part 3 (almost done)

Hi, Family!

Last night was story time about when to lift. Tonight is a double lesson but no story time. Let’s go!

UTR Lesson #3 – Excellence speaks silent volumes.

Each person below had a specific job and they were exceptional in it. Their excellence was so pronounced that they were asked to do it for years.

Some of them, like Dr. Yancey (bottom right) had academic preparation to adequately describe the miracle of Lazarus’s death. I’ve never been so excited to hear about death in my life. Trust me, Family, you will almost throw your shoe during his soliloquy. Get the recording. You’ll also see him sing opera, but don’t tell him I told you. 🙂

Pastor Mark V. Brown, Sr. and his shofar (top left). Powerful. Each performance, he would sit patiently and wait until his appointed time. No fanfare. Gentle smile. Focused and calm. I admired his position and stewardship of such a revered symbol.

Mr. Hubert (top right) built the props and orchestrated his team like a conductor leads a symphony. He knew every piece of every part and could move something in record time. When I asked him if he went to school for it, he said no… God showed him what to do. *mind blown*

Ms. Ruthie was my sweet firecracker (bottom left). Everything was on stage because of her amazing stage management. Impeccable, small, and mighty. With her white gloves and super stare, this production ran like a ship seasoned for the seas.

The voice of Antonio Bowman is one to be marveled. I can’t tell you how many times I cried and jumped when he sang during the Triumphal Entry. Every year, that’s the voice you’re waiting for and every year, he sings like it’s his last (his words, not mine). I also can’t tell you how many times we laughed backstage. Jokes are good for the soul and we had plenty.

Excellence is consistent and UTR resurrected that truth in me. I’ve been working in the arts since I was child. From then to even now, people assumed I didn’t need help because it didn’t look like it. A sliver of burnout was peeking over the horizon and I prayed it wouldn’t rise. I prayed that God would resuscitate me for the rest of the journey because I love my lanes. Whether behind the scenes, hosting a principal part, or delivering several parts, excellence was everywhere that weekend and it was life-giving. Then, God gave me Lesson #4.

UTR Lesson #4 – A dream takes a village.

The beauty about a dream is that isn’t yours.

The birth plan of a vision can expand well over 9 months, but the best part is that you’re not alone. You’re actually part of a symphony. You just haven’t met the rest of the musicians yet.

When I observed these moments in time, I couldn’t help but notice a proverbial hum of workmanship in every area. The make-up team was preparing the dancers for their next scene. The sound technicians checked levels. The gloved hands of the crew waiting for their cue to raise the curtain or the actor in his harness. Ashlee and I formed a tag team to take down a disciple’s braided hair (representation is important in Biblical performances, by the way).

When excellence is at work, God will bring the village. He will send the help. I believe that now more than ever.

Being a creative can be daunting, but being a creative in Kingdom arts can compound the fatigue. The idea is that you don’t need anything or anyone because you’re doing it for God and God has everything, so hey… you’ll be alright. Just keep going. Who cares if you have one leg left, an eyeball barely in socket, and a sore throat? Who cares if you can’t pay your bills because you’ve donated all of your labor? God is good! Keep going! Well, that’s a narrative I vow to change – in a different avenue, so let’s get back to this road.

The miracle of UTR is that two people multiplied into many hands which created lighter work, yet the excellence was not watered down. That’s amazing to me. No longer do you have to toil in a silo (talking to myself).

What a village, we were. My mother and aunt served food to hundreds of cast and crew. My two sisters/Workmanship Incorporated teammates were part of the make-up squad. Two young ladies that grew up in the production were now applying make-up and lashes on two veteran department directors. I helped one year and brought others. Others helped and brought more others.

The village.

There goes that Lesson #1 again.

Simply put, the vision seems too big because I am not designed to carry it alone.

God will send me my village to help me carry out his instructions. I no longer feel heavy with doubt that I won’t be able to carry the vision to term. I see what’s possible if I just do my part in excellence.

The same goes for you, Family. If you’re standing next to an incredible task, know that you’re not alone. Someone else is standing next to one and possibly the same one. Looking up at it and getting dizzy.

We have help coming. Encouragement, financials, employees, volunteers, venues… it’s coming. And if you look around – just pause and look – you might find that your help is already here.

I’m praying for you. We got this. Keep dreaming.

Peace & Thanks for listening. I love y’all.

Resurrect Me – Part 2

Hi, Family!

Last night, I described how God resurrected my hope in His promises and that He would grow every seed I plant in Him.

Let’s dive into the next lesson with a little bit of story time.

UTR Lesson #2 – Know when to lift.

So, I was backstage doing my one job at the moment – wash the theatrical blood off of Jesus in 60 seconds.

Beforehand, my teammates and I had figuratively dissected the actor into quadrants with specific duties assigned to each area. Mine was RIGHT LEG WASH and RIGHT ARM/SHOULDER RINSE/DRY. I was ready. This particular brand of theatrical blood was syrupy, so as it cooled, it resembles the real thing. Two buckets of hotter-than-warm soapy water and one bucket of warm water were on deck. We were ready.

The actor rushed into the wings after his scene and we got to work.


I started with his shins and finished with his feet. 

Leg done. Start shoulder.

Broad strokes with warm water. 

Pat dry. Done.

Then my department head asked me to transfer to his left arm to ensure all the stage blood was removed. There was a larger shadow on that side of his body, so I took a broad brush approach with firm pressure below the elbow. Just then, I saw a tinge of red on his forearm and I was determined to make it disappear. My department head and teammates were feverishly fueled by perfection. We weren’t in the business of making mistakes with so little time to spare.

My left hand gripped his wrist and I went to work. My right hand moved in hyper-speed to attack that red tinge. After confirming its annihilation, I reached down to grab a towel to dry the area and then it happened.

Now, I was taught that once an actor no longer feels your “working touch,” they may assume you’re finished with the quick change and move prematurely. So, my left hand was still in place. 


“It’s good,” he said before whisking away to set.

I was surprisingly offended and it was less than a second. My mind knew not to be sensitive because things move so fast in theater that you can’t stay in your feelings about anything. People truly have things to do and places to be – and you have to roll with wherever they land. This includes a flick of the arm from an actor playing Jesus. 

I looked at the floor in confusion and hoped that his white garment was safe. I told myself not to be offended, but it was too late. I couldn’t let it go. 

“I was just doing my job… he didn’t even see it on his arm…” I kept regurgitating silently. If I didn’t get all of that blood off and it transferred to his spotless white garments, I was going to hear about it, I said in my mind before going to bed.

Certainly, he didn’t mean anything by it.
Certainly, I wasn’t out of pocket, was I? I definitely didn’t want to be a hindrance to his excellence.
Certainly, I was just swimming in some bathwater the devil made for my feelings.

I had made up my mind. I was going to talk to Jesus tomorrow.

Gearing up for the Ascension

When I woke up the next morning, I heard the following in my spirit – “He knew when to lift. That’s what I need you to do. You have to know when to shift to the next level. Know when to move with Me.”

I instantly understood what He meant.

“OK, I get it… and I’m going to tell Jesus so this other junk won’t swim around my spirit and leave a terrible tub ring around my last UTR experience. I have to tell him that I appreciate the lesson he didn’t know he gave me.”

So, that’s what I did, well… almost.

Quick change check in

“OK, Lord…” I said in my best Gideon-in-Judges-Chapter 6 voice, “…if you want me to bring this up, bring him to me. Make me run into him or something. I don’t want to search for him and interrupt his preparation in case he has to switch roles tonight. I don’t want to make it weird or annoying.” In less than 2 minutes, he passed me in the hallway in plain clothes.

OK, he must be going somewhere, so I’ll leave him be. This is small. I’ll wait, I thought. 

Another passby in plain clothes.

Then another.

Then he comes into the dressing room for us to adjust his costume. He was having some fun in supporting roles since he wasn’t playing Jesus that evening.

After 8 times of either passing by him, standing near him unaware, or interacting with him in costume, I was over it. 

“OK, OK! I’ll do it now!” It was the most I had randomly seen him all weekend. “This is ridiculous!” I harshly whispered to myself in the hallway.

I returned backstage (where I had passed by him the 8th time) and spilled the story of my pseudo-offended moment the night before and my divine epiphany the morning after. 

He hollered with laughter because he didn’t realize he was being a spiritual instructor. He expressed his appreciation to us for working on him in record time. He said he never wants to come across as an ungrateful actor and that he admires the work of production crews. We talked about some creative experiences and I told him that I appreciated his professionalism and that I am grateful to assist creatives because I am one. We agreed that we are carriers of God’s gifts and the curators of the greatest story ever told. So, it’s an honor to do what we do. 

Carlin (left) and Daniel (right) alternated the role of Jesus. Both rocked it. If you are O+, consider being a living kidney donor to Carlin.

“I don’t like to give the devil any room to grow,” I said, “and all he needs is a crack. I didn’t want this to fester in my head to something it wasn’t. So, thanks for hearing me out.”

“No problem!” he affirmed. We had a couple of laughs and ended the conversation with an introduction and handshake because we had never formally met.

“My name is Christina. It’s nice to meet you.”

“Daniel. It’s nice to meet you too.”

We parted ways and I felt like a victor.

I had attacked the enemy in two places and won both of them.

First, the lies. There was nothing for evil to tap dance on later. I cut it off at the pass with the guidance of the Holy Spirit. I left that production free and clear. No residue.

Second, the lesson. I received confirmation of two words God gave me on December 31, 2022 – activate and lift.

I admit that sometimes I get stuck in analysis paralysis when God stretches me. I can churn that God-given idea so much that it no longer looks like butter. The details appear overwhelming and there I am, stuck in a stormy see of me. So, I do nothing. Then, I beat myself up for doing nothing… which then causes me to overanalyze on why I didn’t do something.

The truth is we don’t always activate what God tells us to do in real time. We don’t always move on our yes. We say we’ll do whatever the Lord says, but when He’s ready, we say wait – just like I was with the red tinge. Daniel knew when to move and he was willing to take the risk to ensure he was in place at the right time.

Maybe you’re afraid of getting it wrong or afraid of success. Maybe you’re stuck in the minutiae or feeling inept. Whatever it is, acknowledge it and take the step. Have the conversation. Write the vision (Habakkuk 2:2-4). The lift comes when you work in tandem with God’s timing. You have to stay in tune with the rhythm of your purpose.

I thank God for resurrecting my urgency to move with Him. What a tragedy it would be to stay stuck on a level after He’s ready to lift? I don’t want to be the hold up. Do you?

I didn’t think so.

Peace & Thanks for listening. I love y’all. See you tomorrow. 🙂

Resurrect Me – Part 1

Hi, Family!

How’s your April been so far? Mine has been eventful to say the least, but let’s narrow it down to one theme – resurrection.

I know Easter is over, but the impact of its presence is yet here. One of these experiences was volunteering with the exceptional Upon This Rock Productions (referenced as UTR) based in Indianapolis, IN. So many lessons floated to the surface of my spirit while I was there this month.

I won’t attempt to put every lesson into one post. This space is too small to attempt such a feat. Instead, I plan to share a few parts over the next few days. I hope it helps.

UTR Lesson #1 – Let God grow you.

The beauty of God’s creation is that it is designed to regenerate itself. To perpetuate the “Let there be…”

So, when I stood on stage during the final curtain call, I felt like a humbled witness — a butterfly on the wall of time. Music paused to give way to the silence of grateful souls basking in the moment. It was beautiful to marinate in the fruit of obedience. A written idea turned into a shared mission which turned into 40-year production with thousands of cast and crew. The yes opened the door to a thousand ships that carried others toward their purpose.

Spoken Word.


Prop Construction.





Costume Design.

Special Effects

Hair & Make-Up





Stage Management.


Sign Language.

Light and Sound Technology.

And more.

Purpose. Rich, bountiful purpose that flowed from a pen into the hearts of generations. I’m so blessed to be part of something so true and tangible. Something that would feed my spirit for the rest of my life. I know the road was filled with juniper and jagged edges, but the final curtain call was worth the wait – worth the investment of tears and treasure. So, when I saw these moments, I scrambled for my phone to capture a raindrop of the majesty I felt.

Who knows what amazing things await them on the other side of this final bow. What bond they will forge or what creation will bear their names one day. The whole weekend, all I saw were seeds. I felt like I was walking through a spiritual meadow of lush green grass and a kaleidoscope of flowers. My smile kept escaping from my heart and across my lips. My gaze filled with wonder. Occasionally, a “wow” would exhale into the air.

As the directors shared their thank you’s, I stood there in awe of the power of a seed. The power of one yes. The power God gave us to regenerate ourselves through His gifts, especially His gift of Love. When God said “Let there be…,” we were intentionally included. How amazing is that?

Everything around me was proof that life lives in every seed… and that one life has seeds that can usher generations.

It’s worth the yes. When we agree with God’s timing, we fall in tandem with the maturation of those seedlings. We become eternal partners with Him. 

I’m grateful for UTR and the yes that started it all. My feet stand on the proof that God keeps His promises and will walk with you on the journey to dreams beyond your imagination.

Consider purchasing a digital copy of the shows (each is dramatically different). UTR is good ground. This production just fulfilled its season, but there are more seeds coming.

Here’s to our dead places being renewed according to the Father’s timing.
Here’s to our dreams being resuscitated and our next steps flourishing.
Here’s to our hearts breathing in new possibilities of love and life.

May God water our yes so it may bloom forever.

I believe in us and the power of our seeds.

Thank you to my beautiful big sister Monéca S. Reid for connecting me to this tree so I can grow too.

Peace & Thanks for listening. I love y’all! See you tomorrow! 🙂

Wednesday Wind Down: Respect the Ashes

Happy Wednesday Family!

I hope you’ve had a good week so far. If not, it just got better.

I knew what I wanted to write about tonight, then God leveled it up by connecting some dots I didn’t know existed – Ash Wednesday + Soulful Sunday.

Let me start with Sunday.

I did something I would have normally repelled me – I participated in a singing competition. To understand the gravitas of this statement, you would have to know me personally and only so much of that can be translated on this screen. In essence, I was shamed for singing when I was a child and it scarred me from singing in public. The anxiety grew visible through my shaky, sweaty hands to my unruly vibrato. Fast forward some years and I registered for vocal lessons as a means of healing this wound. Our first session she lifted me with encouragement and affirmation. “You can sang, Baby. You have a gift.” I didn’t believe her, but I really wanted to.

My instructor, mentor, and pillar –
International Vocalist, Actress, and Educator
Ms. Tena Wilson

Every week, I went to class swaddled in insecurity and she unraveled them note-by-note. I embraced the opportunity for freedom to heal that space, then the pandemic occurred. Virtual vocal and music theory classes became part of my self-care regimen. I cried. I sang. I laughed. I learned.

Fast forward to this past Sunday when I stood in front of people physically and virtually and sang God Bless The Child by Billie Holiday. I’m tearing up as I’m typing this right now because it took healing to get here and those words embody that for me. The winner and I were separated by three-tenths of a point, but I left that stage on top of the world. I was proud of me and I could stand in the Sonshine unapologetically. I was grateful for the opportunity and support. Grateful for the warmth of confidence that only God can give. I made new connections and hugged those that have lasted for years. It was a beautiful moment of growth and I beamed all the way back to work. I had a mobile massage client. *lol*

So, let’s where today comes in.

The ashes.

A traditional phrase for ceremonies surrounding Ash Wednesday is “Remember, you are dust and to dust you shall return.” When we reflect upon our mortality and surrender our humanity to our supernatural purpose, beauty happens. Springtime can happen. As the article mentions (click the link), the Christian period of “Lent comes from the Middle English word lente, which means springtime.” How befitting that we render down our lives in order for life to grow. Introspection, fasting, meditation, and prayer are forms of sacrifice for the springtime. Soulful Sunday is just one example of how God can exchange beauty for ashes (Isaiah 61:3) but we have to give him the crumbles first. Surrender is required. My tears of inadequacy watered the seeds of creativity in my heart. My vocal instructor’s divine mix of gentleness and discipline was the sunshine on my frosty soil.

The dust is where we’re from and it’s also where we grow.

As we prepare for 40 days of spiritual reflection, strength, and sacrifice, I encourage you to bring your ashes to the altar. God can do more with them than you can. When we leave this earth, let it be said that we lived. On purpose and fully engaged. Let it be said that we did not waste our tears and our seeds sprouted into their intended design. That we respected the process and walked the journey to completion. That we remembered we were beautiful in His sight.

Respect the ashes, Family. We all got some and they are all necessary.

Peace & Blessings to your week and I love y’all.


Thursday Love: Battery Life

I fell asleep with the lights and laptop on last night, Family, but I wasn’t going to miss your short stop for the week. It’s less than 500 words, so let’s get into it!

Do you let your phone battery die often?

My mother was the prime example of this behavior. In the middle of a conversation, the call would end abruptly. She would catch it before it died sometimes and give me a quick benediction. One day, I said “Ma, how do you let your phone die in the house? You have all of the electricity you need and you won’t plug it in. That’s hilarious.”

She chuckled. So did I. Then we were cackling like cartoon hyenas.

“I’m just sayin’, Ma… you pay for it – every month!”

We laughed until our eyes leaked with tears.

“You know, you’re right! I can’t say nothin’ but you’re right!” she hollered between laughing spells.

Photo by SHVETS production on

When you think about it, we do this too. Well, I rarely let my phone die, but some good things have perished because I didn’t plug into an opportunity. Networking events host people that can assist your dreams. Social settings yield fertile ground for collaborations to flourish, but fear of failure, imposter syndrome, or downright shyness can choke you. I would be in a room full of outlets and let my proverbial phone die. I would talk myself out of simply opening my mouth.

But, I’ve been changing that since last year.

It’s resulted in speaking engagements, new clients, new colleagues, budding friendships and upcoming travel. I just had to plug into the room – more importantly, plug into the moment. I couldn’t keep making excuses and being cozy in my silo. Life was in the same space as my heartbeat. Opportunity was floating around me like a graceful dancer. All I had to do was connect. Something so simple seemed so far away as I wanted to reach out with crippled emotions, but I did it over and over again until it became soft like an old sweater.

Photo by Karolina Grabowska on

What are you not plugging into, Family? Where is life budding and why are you letting your potential die? Are there outlets in your community, place of worship, workplace, or coffee shop? I’ve always been great at making genuine personal connections, but I’m learning how to crush negative self-talk when it comes to professional opportunities. Maybe you need a little nudge in both arenas. That’s OK. Now you know.

Let’s continue to grow in this Earth pot together. There’s a lot of battery life to power us all.

Peace & Thanks for listening. I love y’all.

Wednesday Wind Down: So Beautiful

Hi, Family!

Imagine the following:

You’re sitting at your work desk, typing out the dreams you hope to produce while listening to a jazzy playlist.

You feel a little down with the possibility that you won’t see all of them come true. Shallow breaths flow underneath your N95 mask as you struggle through the emotional wave.

You stay distracted enough to walk past the detours of doubt, but you still feel that you should be further along in life. So to prevent from diving into that rabbit hole, you turn the music up a little and keep bobbing your head to the groove. The tapping of the keystrokes serve as pink noise and you’re officially in the zone.

Like a soft tap on the shoulder, a sweet familiar chord leaks through your earbuds. Your fingers pause. Your eyes close and a smile escapes your soul and rests lightly on your face.

Out of nowhere, an unexplainable warmth showers you from the top of your head to your feet underneath the desk. Your fingers soften and your doubts suddenly seem miniature. And you let yourself bathe in it.

Photo by Radu Florin on

That’s what I did.

I let myself float in the words of that song. Then it began to transcribe differently onto my heart. The love song no longer was about a paramour – it felt like my Father was reminding me of how special I was. The lyrics were replaced with a paternal love that was rich, real, and deep. I felt undeniably loved. Undeniably confident. Comforted, beautiful, and exquisite. I felt priceless like any princess should be.

It was an exceptional moment that filled me up at work in less than 5 minutes. While typing out my dreamy plans and feeling inadequate. The affirmation was all I needed to remember who I was more than what I did.

That’s what Love should leave you with –fullness and freedom.

It’s not about how size of the gift and how you can flaunt it on social media.

Love affirms and covers our weak areas. Love doesn’t leave a deficit. It warms our souls when life feels cold and apathetic. We don’t like to admit it, but it’s easy to get distracted by disappointment. You don’t get the call, the date, the ring, etc. It’s only because we expect from someone that isn’t designed to fill us eternally. So, we sulk around holidays like Valentine’s Day, Christmas, and New Year’s if we are not spending time with people or receive their attention. In reality, it’s also hard to admit they may not value us in return.

“Love doesn’t leave a deficit.”

– C.J. Wade

You should never be a second-thought and your heart health is not contingent upon someone else.

So, depressurize Valentine’s Day. Just enjoy the Tuesday and love your neighbor as yourself (Mark 12:30-31). Besides… next thing you know, it will be Wednesday and we’ll meet back here with 50% off candy.

You are so beautiful because God made you to be a masterpiece. Those who do not see you are simply blind to your wonder.

Peace & Thanks for listening. I love y’all.

Wednesday Wind Down: I’m Falling For It

Happy New Year, Family! (Yes, it’s still new.)

I hope your January went well and your February is falling in alignment.

I don’t know about you, but it’s been a jam-packed so far. A lot of good, a wave of grief, jolts of anticipation, some foggy fatigue, and a lot of “what the what?” The second month of the year is fresh and I’m already wondering what else is in store.

From my continued health goals to smashing through internal brick walls with courageous fists, I’m in 2023 with my whole heart. All of me.

And that’s not a comfortable arena, but I’m willing to walk forward in everything God is calling me to do.

Photo by Ketut Subiyanto on

It’s official. I’ve fallen in love with my journey.

The curves, the mountaintops, the forests, the depths… all of it. All of me.

And if I unfasten my armor a little, you’ll also find traces of fear. Christians hate to admit that, but I don’t mind saying it. God already knows its there, so why not? Both co-exist in my chest at any given moment. It’s the mix of knowing your marching orders and still feeling butterflies as you take the first step. It’s taking off your security blanket and feeling the chill before the warmth.

It’s saying “OK, let’s go.”

Photo by Lina Kivaka on

At this point in my life, I’ve finally fallen in love with faith. I never thought I would say those words. The open space over the line of trust can be intimidating if you forget who’s on the other side… the better version of yourself. The purpose smoldering inside of your heart. The beautiful blooms waiting to break forth from the garden of your soul.

My prayer is that you fall in love with the grit because you know it’s going to make you shine.

That you fall in love with the mud because it’s where the seeds live.

I pray you hold God’s hand and fall in love.

Peace & Thanks for listening. I love y’all. 🙂


Wednesday Wind Down: Application

Hi, Family!

Thank you so much for being patient with my posting gaps this year. I’ve been realigning my lifestyle and it has been WHEW! Effective yet difficult. That’s actually what I want to talk to you about.

When it’s done properly, application will ruffle your feathers and question everything you know.

It will straighten you up and make you walk properly. It will wreck your familiar and reconstruct a new normal.

And that’s what it’s been doing to me.

While I was used to writing you every Wednesday before bed, my body demanded more rest. My mind yelled for change. My spirit heard the divine directive to write earlier in the day and sometimes, days prior. “But where do I fit that in?” I asked numerous times. “I’ll just write it Wednesday night.” Yeah, we see how that turned out. What you don’t see are the multiple blog drafts where I started the message and fell asleep in the middle of production. What good did that do?

Photo by Andrea Piacquadio on

That’s not application. That’s not where growth lives.

And I’ve been allowing God to rearrange everything – from my mental furniture to my spiritual operating system. I would love to tell you that, in October, I have all the new gears running but that is a big fat NO.

I’m still working on it.
I’m still digesting.
I’m still getting acclimated.
And I’m all in for the application.

Imagine how spiritually strong we would be if we digested every scripture we heard from every sermon. Now, imagine how gluttonous or emaciated some of us are from not allowing the Word of God to nourish our spirits. It’s crazy, isn’t it? To envision a physical representation of both spiritual extremes. To fathom the notion that we are not growing to our purposeful capacity. That as many YouTube sermons, Instagram sermon clips, bible studies, and inspirational books we consume, we are still somehow unwell. Unstable. Angry. Confused. Hurt. Longing. Wandering. Scared.

Allow me to share what I heard this week –

“You can know scripture all day long, but until you apply it – you don’t know it.

– heard 10/17/22 @ 2:00 AM

You can’t apply the Word like makeup. It isn’t meant to cover and disguise. It is meant to clean.

In the world of make-up artistry, an applicator is used to place or spread make-up on the body without transference to and from the make-up artist (MUA). The Word of God is designed to seep into the deepest parts of you, not spread across the surface. Until you apply it, it will sit on the surface of your heart for decades. Big Christian conferences and all.

Photo by Pixabay on

Application requires vulnerability and annihilation of pride. It requires the ability to open your heart to change. It’s a statement. Even when you apply for a job, you’re opening your skills and schedule to meet the need of an employer. The application is a gateway agreement that states “I will share myself with you and you will share yourself with me.”

Courtesy of my YouVersion Bible App

I used to tell my students that until they could explain the concept to someone, they didn’t understand it. And if they didn’t understand it, they didn’t know it. Until I saw application, I wasn’t convinced they absorbed the information. I believe God wants us to understand His Love beyond memorizing verses. I admonish you (and me) to submit your application to the Word of God. Make the statement. Surrender the contract to let the Scriptures live in your life. Only then will change come true.

That’s what I’m doing, and it’s uncomfortable and invigorating. Just like we develop physically, I am determined to constantly develop spiritually. It’s worth it. I don’t want to die in a stunted state.

My prayer for you is to be open to true spiritual growth. I pushing through the dirt just like you.

So, what are you working on?

Peace & Thanks for listening. I love you all.

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