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#bloglikecrazy: Day 17 -There Is Repair

The Good

#17 – I spent time with Sorors that I haven’t enjoyed in years.

Before I was a member of Sigma Gamma Rho Sorority, Inc, I joined Tau Beta Sigma National Honorary Band Sorority. While in undergrad, I was lied on about a sensitive issue and the hurt resulted in me deciding not to remain connected to my chapter. I was close to a few Sorors but was not interested in repairing relationships as a whole. This year, I made a point to be emotionally transparent enough to allow love to flow in that vein again. Best decision made. We laughed, ate great food, exposed our thoughts, and vowed to excavate the ugliness and start the repairing process. I have had an absolute blast with these lovely ones ever since.

The Lesson

Repair is possible if you want it to be. When teaching introduction to communication, I use the following definition found in Communicating for Success by Cheryl M. Hamilton: Communication is a transactional process by which people, interacting in a particular context, negotiate the meaning of verbal and nonverbal symbols in order to achieve shared understanding. 

There are some relationships that served their purpose and I am not interested in repairing, rebuilding, or refreshing them. Then, there are some that all it takes is the commitment to seek understanding for something beautiful to grow. Even if we don’t agree, we can agree to have a meaningful transaction full of honesty, sincerity, and just plain old love. Yes, I can love you and not become intertwined into your life again if it is not a safe place for me to breathe, but if there is life there… there is the opportunity to repair, rebuild, and refresh. If both parties desire to do so, it is possible to communicate in a healthy way to allow aeration of the soul. What happens after that? *shrugs* That’s the part you have to let go. That’s the part that isn’t wrapped up nicely in a bow. You may pour your heart out to each other and still decide that you do not want to repair, but at least you created the space for Truth to flow. And that was the Good part.

Peace & Thanks for listening!

#bloglikecrazy: Day 12 – Here Comes The Judge

The Good

#12 – I judged the Camille Armstrong Memorial Scholarship Stepshow again!

For the UAB community, the Camille Armstrong Memorial Scholarship Stepshow is a Black Greek family reunion. The step routines, the strolls, and the passionate chants created memories that NPHC organizations will remember for years to come. But what really makes the alumni come outside on a cold February night is the chance to laugh and chat with old friends. Being a former participant in the step show and a former executive board member of the Black Student Awareness Committee (the hosts of the show), I am always honored and appreciative to serve as a judge for this beautiful event. Regardless of the banter shared across the organizational color line, we’re threads of a historical tapestry of academic and community excellence and nothing can tear that apart.

The Lesson

Legacy is everything. The relationships that formed as a result of being Greek in Birmingham, Alabama still vibrate with love and respect to this day. Being a judge means that I have the opportunity to keep the art form of stepping alive with integrity and excitement. As a choreographer, that means everything to me. As an alumna, it makes me proud. I went from attending the step show to assisting with it -> to being on the executive board -> to judging it. When I sat for a minute and thought about it, I appreciated the blessing to be involved in those ways.

For my collegiate Sweethearts, take note of your relationships. You don’t have to be a member of a sorority or fraternity to have meaningful interactions. When you’re in college, you have the opportunity to make friends that last a lifetime and the chance to leave a legacy. Serve where you can. Meet people you have nothing in common with. Attend events that you have no clue about. Be safe and explore where your legacy begins.

Peace, Thanks for listening, and Happy Founders’ Day, my SoRHOrs! EEE-YIP! #SigmaGammaRho #LastCreatedBestDesigned

#bloglikecrazy: Day 11 – The Game

The Good

#10 – I had a movie night with my pRHOphyte Cindy… and won!

So, there’s this game that my pRHOphyte and I play and I finally won… after 17 years. She’s one of the founding members of my sorority’s chapter at the University of Alabama at Birmingham and a serious movie buff. I try to stump her by picking a movie that she’s never seen and until this year, I would lose… horribly. This is usually how it goes:

ME: “Oooooo, Cindy, I got one for you this time! It’s a good one!”

CINDY: *giggles* “OK. What’s the name of it?”

ME: *insert movie title here*

CINDY: “Oh, yeah, that’s the one where she *insert scene description here*. That is a good one.”

ME:  *face palm*

See my plight? See why I’m excited? You try going through that year after year and see where your cinematic self-esteem goes. Well, this time, I picked one she had never seen and she loved it. Woohoo!

The Lesson

Find something to enjoy with people you care about and set a date! It’s fun to share something different with different people in your circle and there’s a way to uniquely connect with each of your friends.

Ruby Tuesday may not be their thing and they may hate hiking, but they may love bowling and get excited about NASCAR or history. Whatever it is, find it and share it with them. You may love it, hate it, or truthfully, you may enjoy the same sports team but hate watching the game together. lol! At the end of the day, extend yourself a bit and enjoy something together. You may be surprised by how strong your bond can truly be.

Peace, Thanks for listening, and Happy Veteran’s Day to all military service personnel and their families! Fellow civilians, have you paid your vet-debt-a today?

flag america patriotic veteran
Photo by Snapwire on Pexels.com

#bloglikecrazy: Day 10 – Celebration of Life

The Good

#10 – I was able to celebrate the life of my SoRHOr and witness the baptism of her son.

It was bittersweet, but I was honored to attend both occasions. My Sorority Sister passed away in January and my SoRHOrs gathered to support her family and each other. Four months later, I listened to her son express his pain and revelation before being baptized by my pastor. The Good was simply being present, to celebrate life on both accords.

The Lesson

The life we live has the opportunity to affect others for the rest of their lives. We only get one chance to walk this Earth and what we do with it is crucial. There is equal opportunity to help and hurt everyone we meet. Perfection is not promised, but authenticity is attainable. We should live this life to enrich the soil of other souls. Why else would you need to breathe? Every breath is a chance to make something better. My SoRHOr Nicki did that. That’s why I was able to learn Legend in the process of becoming a member of Sigma Gamma Rho Sorority, Inc. and feel the essence of her passion, hug her and experience the love of one SoRHOr to another, and shed tears at her funeral. Her life impacted mine and when I see her husband and children, I speak. I hug them too. She multiplied herself in them and in me.

What type of life are you multiplying?

Peace & Thanks for listening!

 

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