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Listening at the Speed of Life

– by C. J. Wade –

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purpose

Wednesday Wind Down: A is for Advocate – PART 2

Happy Thursday, Family!

Since last week’s post, I have spoken to 10 people about self-advocacy – some strangers and some within my circle – and I don’t think this is by accident at all.

What I’ve realized is that humans (including myself) are willing to put up with abusive behavior from all angles. When we think of abuse, we often imagine physical turmoil, but it has many forms. By a singular person or by collective experience, we allow a cycle of abuse acceptance.

Photo by Joey Kyber on Pexels.com

When you’re a Christian, this cycle has multiple rings like an old tree. We are told that there is no glory without suffering, and while that is true in some capacities (just think of an athlete training for the Olympics), it should not be the soundtrack for our daily lives. We tell ourselves a lie that the more suffering, the closer to God we are and that being meek and humble means not being assertive. This loop of lies causes us not to self-advocate when needed and so the cycle of abuse acceptance continues. In essence, we abuse ourselves. I’m not talking about letting something slide for your peace of mind’s sake. I’m referring to always placing yourself in 2nd place or even worse, at the back of the line.

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Here’s a recent example –

A health provider presented appointment time options. I wanted the 10:30 AM appointment, but I have a client that usually books a noon session. Now, the client’s session was not on the calendar yet, but my first inclination was to schedule the health appointment around the possible session. A few seconds after the thought leaped from my lips, I stopped the cycle. I confirmed the shift with a verbal affirmation. “I am important enough to be on my calendar. Please put me down for the 10:30 appointment. Anyone booking me will have to catch me after that time.” I blocked the 12:00 hour in my booking software to provide the necessary space. She nodded her head and proceeded to schedule me. I needed to do that… for me, for my heart, for my mental health, for my spirit. I needed to remind myself that my health was the priority instead of making myself available for something that may not happen.

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That’s why some of these posts have been on Thursdays lately. I had to ingest my own wisdom when I’m too exhausted to post quality thoughts. I have to say, “Pushing through this moment will not yield the best of me. I need to go to bed.” So, instead of beating myself up about missing a Wednesday, I relinquish my pride and go to sleep. Why? Because Jesus snatched solitude when He needed too (Mark 1:35). He paused and prayed to refuel his spirit (Luke 5:15-16). He did not allow his ministry to deplete Him. *insert record scratch here* Let me say that again – He did not allow his ministry to deplete Him. He knew there was a divine appointment that would need all of his focus and he geared up for it along the way.

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Self-advocacy preserves us for our purpose. It allows the mind, body, and spirit to be healthy enough to do exceptional things and have beautiful moments with others. It is not selfish when it is in your best interest. This is why the backlash against Naomi Osaka does not surprise me. We celebrate exertion over well-being. We would rather look good than be well. We prefer to say “If you can’t handle the pressure, change jobs.” instead of saying “I respect your decision. How can I support you?” We perpetuate the cycle of abuse acceptance both inside and outside of ourselves and that is by design. I believe evil forces seek to stress and tire you out before your divine appointments arrive. So, when it’s time to activate the excellence within you, you’re depleted. Well, I’m on a mission to change that for myself.

My prayer for you, Family, is that you join me in making small changes in your schedule… small changes with your interactions… small changes in your workplace. Ask God to show you what you need to function optimally and I guarantee He will show you. I am a witness of this truth. He cares about our earthen vessels and I care about you too.

Peace & Thanks for listening!

Wednesday Wind Down: Cash and Carry

Hi Sweethearts!

Twas the day before the night before Christmas, huh?

I hope you aren’t stressed and that you and your family are safe and sound.

Here’s some motivation for your holiday week.

What are you willing to cash in order to carry your purpose? Spoiler Alert: I’m not talking about money here. Ready for a quick dive? Let’s go!

When Mary received the news that she would be carrying the Messiah of the World in Luke 1:26-38, she had two reactions – “How?” and “I’m in.”

Two reactions.

Now, I can’t lie to you — my reactions would have been multiplied, starting with “You talkin’ to me?”

Photo by Andrea Piacquadio on Pexels.com

I guess that’s why she was found to be honorable and favored (verse 28). *lol* She trusted God enough to be a daughter (“How?”) and a servant (“I’m in”) and God trusted her enough to allow her to be the mother of Jesus.

Quick detour– have you ever heard of cash-and-carry? A good bit of these stores no longer exist, so it’s OK if you haven’t. Cash-and-carry is a term that indicates a direct exchange of currency for products instead of offering financing options. These stores usually host wholesale or big ticket items.

Let’s look at Mary.

When she asked how, she gained understanding of what this type of motherhood would cost her. As a Jewish girl, she was aware of the scriptures surrounding the Messiah. She knew she would receive ridicule and mockery. She knew that it was an odd mode of delivery because He was expected to come to Earth in grandeur. She knew she would have to watch Him die for the sins of the world. She quickly analyzed her cash — the sacrifice of being physically, spiritually, and emotionally attached to the lineage of Jesus. That’s some serious dough.

She said “I’m in.”

My question for you again is What are you willing to cash in order to carry your purpose?

Photo by Andrea Piacquadio on Pexels.com

Mary decided to walk into her purpose heart-in-hand beyond baby-in-belly. She and Joseph both cashed in their conveniences to carry their purposes. Joseph as a carpenter, not a corporate executive. There wasn’t a significant amount of funds for such a surprise as this. He was also within his cultural right to disown Mary immediately, but his heart was found righteous in God’s eyes. Let’s not run over the fact that the angel encouraged him to take Mary as his wife — his co-laborer, his laughing partner, his forever home — not just an appendage to take care of the baby. This was a long-term commitment. This was a serious sacrifice. This was serious LOVE.

So, what’s my cash? My vulnerability is definitely part of my heart-in-hand. As an introvert, I value intimate relationships over large crowds. I power up in solitude. Extending vulnerability is huge for me, yet I’m called to do it every week on this blog, my book, speaking engagements, and other avenues. That’s the interesting part about currency — it varies among us. In exchange for this discomfort, my purpose is fulfilled. Another person realizes he is not alone in his struggles. Another woman accepts that she has a life worth living. Another life is empowered. Another soul is loved.

Photo by Pixabay on Pexels.com

That is worth the sacrifice. That is worth the cash (again, not real cash).

So, I ask you and myself as this year comes to a close, What are you willing to cash in order to carry your purpose? Maybe you need to write yours down. Do what you need to because it is a question to consider going forward. That’s what I’m doing over here.

Peace & Thanks for listening. Stay well and I love you!

#bloglikecrazy: Day 24 – UTR

The Good

#24 – I volunteered for Upon This Rock Passion Play!

This. Was. Amazing. I’ve worked on productions before, but this was an experience. The people worked together like a well-oiled machine, but with strong family ties that oiled each gear. As it approaches its 35th year in 2019, Upon This Rock: The Passion Play is an Indianapolis, Indiana production that includes over 300 cast and volunteer members that makes the Bible come to life in a unique way. Spoken word, live animals, authentic songwriting, the live choir, and band – individuals come from all over the country to be part of UTR and with the great help of my sister, I was able to finally make the trek to experience it for myself.

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My big sister Moe as Martha

The Lesson

When God gives you something, you have an obligation to inhale it and run with it. There’s no time to waste because there are lives that are waiting to be changed by the glory that God gave you. It’s going to take some work, OK… who am I kidding, it’s going to take a lot of work, so it’s not for the faint of heart. You have the ability to complete it and do it well. The biggest obstacle in front of you is YOU. I can’t imagine not experiencing the wealth of creativity, skill, professionalism, and camaraderie that day. So, I am so grateful to Playwright & Executive Director Sharon Thompson-Hill and Co- & Managing Director Pastor A. Thomas Hill for not only hearing the Voice of God, but inhaling the Promise and Direction, and running with the Vision.

Peace & Thanks for listening.

By the way: Show dates are April 19-20, 2019 and tickets go on sale January 1, 2019. Go ahead and put it on your calendar. You won’t regret it.

Wednesday Wind Down: Dichotomic 

Recently, I felt the pain of a woman who’s only desire was to provide the best solution for her children at the expense of what she wished for them. She cried after we prayed together. I bought the items she needed and she agreed to a massage therapy session. I just wanted to help, wanted her to know that I see her. She was the 2nd person for I whom I prayed and to whom I had given. The first person was homeless and when I asked him for a prayer request, his response was to pray for his family. How selfless. These opportunities started hours after I received news that my income would decrease… again. Perfect timing, right? Exactly. That’s what I said too.

Now, I’m not monetarily rich. I’m not a superstar. I don’t have someone taking sensational photos of me at every turn so I can post them on the ‘gram. And I’m definitely not a selfie girl. I just… listen. I sincerely try to listen to God’s voice everyday and anywhere. That’s how this blog Listening at the Speed of Life was born. So, when those opportunities presented themselves, I had to be obedient. No questions asked. 

What have I learned about myself along this journey of obedience? 

  • I hug my students.
  • I even hug strangers. 
  • I pray for people I don’t know.
  • I say thank you. A lot.
  • I love big and I retreat quickly.
  • I boldly express my care.
  • I can speak up when I’m scared.
  • I can ask questions unapologetically. 
  • I seek to understand. 
  • I generally stay to myself, yet I have meaningful relationships.
  • I am a delicate, and resilient balance of mind, body, and spirit.
  • My introversion is beautiful, not a defect.
  • I don’t have to be loud if I don’t want to be.
  • I don’t have to be in the mix to feel included.
  • I like breathing and being, and sometimes these come at the cost of being misunderstood. That’s OK with me now. (It wasn’t when I started.)

So, back to the moment. She was grateful. I was humble. We connected.

The message?

It’s time that we slow down and feel the heartbeat of one another. We’re all humans trying to navigate through this life, and if you’re a Christian, then you’re trying to adhere to a certain compass as you travel on your path. It’s not easy, and we are all doing it… walking it out, journeying into the next dimension of ourselves, and feeling our way around in the darkness of tomorrow’s challenges. 

What would it hurt to wave to the service worker? Speak to the custodian? Give a thank you card to the teacher? Buy an extra meal for the hungry? Or simply hug your friend without it being an obligatory salutation? 

What happened to us orbiting together instead of spinning around each other, being afraid to bump into one another’s space? 

What happened to running the human race together and checking on others along the way?

Peace & Thanks for listening. 

Monday Motivation: Purpose is inconvenient.

Hello, Warriors!

I have a short stop newsflash for you – if you’re all about walking in your purpose, you must be willing to be inconvenienced. Doing what you are born to do requires a level of humility unlike any other.

Think about it.

  • When it’s time to celebrate a big moment, there is usually music and food involved. That means that someone is working while you’re enjoying the fruits of their labor.
  • In 1 Kings 19:19-21, Elisha was called to be a servant of Elijah, he was plowing oxen.
  • In the 2nd chapter that bears her name, Ruth was gleaning fields trying to support her mother-in-law when Boaz found her and she became King David’s great-grandmother.

In order for your purposeful journey to flourish, there is a tilling of the ground, a rehearsal that makes your body sore, a recipe that doesn’t work, or a car that breaks down. Purpose does not make you comfortable. It makes you birth something you didn’t know you had. Jesus’ purpose in delivering us from evil through his death, burial, and resurrection was beyond uncomfortable and it definitely wasn’t at a convenient time. He was approximately 33 years old when completed his mission, and He did more in 33 years than some of us do in our entire lifetime.

So, keep this in mind today – your purpose will be fruitful… and especially inconvenient. What a beautiful dichotomy.

Peace & Thanks for listening!

#bloglikecrazy: Day 16 – Forever 

Forever is a long time to grow. Are you willing to do it?

I mean it. Are you willing to a make a pact with God that you will grow as long as you live here on Earth? After all, we are the seeds of Adam and Eve and quite frankly, there’s still some growing to do. If plants can do it, why can’t we? Why can’t we do what seeds do – germinate and multiply? 

It seems hard to think about, but we are designed to break free from the shell of innocence and yield a life with more seeds to plant. With our words, deeds, and talents, we were created to expand and produce a harvest for others to courageously do the same. 

So, when I say “Forever is a long time to grow,” I intend to invoke conviction of every intrapersonal and interpersonal interaction you will have for the rest of your life. I want you to think about the seeds your fruit is producing for others to ingest. I want you to think about forever

Peace & Thanks for listening!

#bloglikecrazy: Day 22 – Make Room

A short stop for your Christmas Day and Any Day

Luke’s account of Jesus’ life on Earth is one my favorites. There’s something about his physician perspective that humanizes the experiences I read.
This one in particular instantly opens the camera lens to a new mother that clothes her newborn in rags in unsanitary conditions. All because the inn was full. Why would God give Joseph a heads up that his family was in danger and not direct him to better accommodations? On a journey where it was already uncomfortable, here is a mother having contractions in a stable and having to trust that the feeding trough would be sufficient for the King of Kings. What a humbling and terrifying experience. Talk about faith… whew.

I’m always stuck at the “no room in the inn” part. Certainly there was a better option than an animal shelter, but apparently, Mary and Joseph knew something we didn’t.

No matter where Jesus was birthed, He was destined to fulfill His purpose. They just had to make it work. The hay, the rags, the filth, the trough… she made room. That’s all were required to do.

Whenever you are in life, make room.

Create space for purpose to grow. Stop making excuses for what you don’t have and use what is given. The purpose is in you, not the things. God will provide the necessary items in order to bless the readers of your story.

Whatever you do this week, make the room and prepare for it to be filled.

Peace & Thanks for listening!

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