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the write wade

listening at the speed of life

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Wednesday Wind Down: Noted

This week, I learned a valuable lesson. I mean really learned it. You know how you know something, but then at some point, you know it? Well, that’s what happened while I was minding my merry business.

On Sunday, I had a conversation that left me uneasy for 3 days. My chest felt tight every time I thought about it. After all, I had extended so much grace toward this particular entity, and there I was in a conversation about something beyond my control. I told the person in charge that I wasn’t offended, but truthfully, I was trying not to be offended. I was calm at the moment, but on the way home, I vented to God about it but it didn’t help. I was still tinged.

classic photo of a woman holding a tea cup
Photo by Suzy Hazelwood on Pexels.com

I knew I wasn’t upset with the person in authority. After some deep me diving (my emotional intelligence is high), I tapped into the real reason I felt “some kinda way.” I hate for my character to be in question and that was the spot that Sunday’s conversation hit on. So, before bed, I prayed that God would take away my default setting of retraction. I wanted to decrease my workload from this entity and let them know why. I wanted to open the box of grace extensions and remind them how they were not reciprocated. Forcefully, I thanked God for the work and tried to settle into a slumber, but I kept tossing. Still don’t know how I got to sleep, so I’ll chalk it up to divine intervention.

Thanks to the YouTube ministry, I watched a sermon by Bishop T. D. Jakes called God Smells Honor on the way to work (it popped up twice). I had heard the story of Noah a plethora of times but never thought of how the very thing Noah built for safety was also a smelly mess. Just think… animal and human waste + one window. *shudder* Then, Bishop Jakes mentioned that he pastored a church of fewer than 100 members for 10 years in West Virginia. He said it was there that God developed his leadership, integrity, patience, discipline, etc. The main idea of this part in his sermon was that the very place that is uncomfortable, messy, or claustrophobic is the very place you need to grow. So, I paused the video and prayed another prayer that went something like this — “God, whatever it is that you’re trying to develop in me, I accept it. Please help me to understand what I need to learn while I’m here. It’s only going to make me better, so I’m open.”

woman closes her eyes raising her right hand
Photo by Asa Dugger on Pexels.com

Within seconds of that prayer, I received a phone call for more work from that same entity but a different person. Now, what if I was in a petty state of mind at the time of that call? I would have rationalized a reaction that would have actually stunted my growth and my income. Instead of saying no to the work, I said yes… with a clear heart. Then it clicked. The entity is my soil not my enemy. Anything else is smoke and mirrors.

That’s a tactic of the dark forces that be — to create a spirit of offense so that you essentially attack yourself while you’re under construction. You forfeit your growth opportunity and end up being stunted in that area. Maybe it’s something tangible like organization skills or intangible like patience. This is where the Word goes beyond Sunday and meets you in the middle of the road. The broken one that you don’t want to be on.

Tonight, I pray that you grow up and pray a grown prayer. I pray that you see the soil for what it is… a divinely-purposed place to develop something within you or extract something that could negatively affect your future self. I learned that this week in a new way. It’s not easy at all, but anything that has to be birthed, is going to be messy and as long as I allow the smoke and mirrors trick to work, I won’t be able to turn into the improved version of C. J. Wade. I won’t be able to show the version of Jesus that someone needs to see. After all, my character can stand on its own.

By the way, you’ll have to check out Bishop Jakes’ tie between the ark, a cocoon, and a mother’s womb… an epic correlation. 

Peace & Thanks for listening! Here’s to aerating that soil!

 

 

Wednesday Wind Down: Bypass

Happy Wednesday, Sweethearts.

I have a little example for us, but it will still be a shortstop (500 words or less). Are you ready? Great!

Imagine a neighborhood where Love walks around like a 6-foot model wearing a floor-length silk robe. Every step is like art walking. She’s majesty in human form. She smiles with the warmth of a soft spring sun, and as she walks down each street, life spreads. Grass is green. Flowers are in bloom. She’s beautiful and free. Her light flows into every house, on every block, and into every heart.

Now, let’s talk about the heart, more specifically a damaged one. If a heart’s function is impaired and a person’s life is at risk, a doctor may suggest coronary bypass surgery. This requires a healthy blood vessel to be taken from one part of the body and transplanted to the heart in order to create an alternate (and more efficient) route for blood to flow. If this is difficult for you to visualize, just think of your nearest interstate. The bypass was created to alleviate traffic congestion. Not sure if your commute includes one? Here’s a clue: it usually has 3 digits.

i-059_nb_exit_137_03
Photo courtesy of AARoads

One of the realities about the heart is that a damaged one can only be repaired to a certain extent; otherwise, it must be replaced. A bypass is designed to create a new pathway for blood to bring life to the rest of the body, but it is not a transplant.

With that said, let’s tie up the loose ends.

Right now, there are formerly covert ideologies that are showing like a woman’s white slip at a country church. Why? Because there is toxic congestion where the Blood of Jesus should be flowing. Everyone might as well be honking each other during rush hour. You may hear racist comments at the store or made to feel that you are incompetent at work. Perhaps you even heard some of those comments at church. No place seems to be safe except the heart and it’s difficult to love people who view you as inferior. Here’s a reminder that I have to constantly tell myself; they aren’t the problem — their hearts are. I know it seems they will forever be saturated in ignorant privilege, but trust me. It’s a heart thing. Wherever Blood flows, there is Life.

So, wouldn’t it be great to create a bypass for Love to walk freely like that model up there? For Life to grow and bloom wherever she goes? Guess what… you can. Every time you arm yourself with facts instead of sensationalism, you create a bypass. When you perform in excellence, that’s a bypass.

It is imperative that keep your vessel as clear as possible. Create a bypass. Make it a quadruple one if you have to. The down lookers will get over it.

Peace & Thanks for listening! By the way — yes, this post made it in the shortstop category. 🙂

1580981998848_1280x1280.jpg
Photo courtesy of YouVersion – The Bible App

Wednesday Wind Down: For The Village

Hi, Sweethearts.

In times like these, we desperately grasp for shredded remnants of words and memories to stuff into the holes of our despair. We don’t know what to say. We don’t know what to do. We don’t know if we want to breathe. We just know what we had, what we wish was left, and what we never want to let go.

Times like these also force us to do things. They make us pause, be more grateful, drop the petty ish (hopefully), and love deeper. The pain is horrible, but it does make us pour. We release empathy, tenderness, compassion, and camaraderie. Right now, I’m thinking about that outpour. The tighter grip we place on what we value most… each other. I’ve seen hashtags, photos, and videos that celebrate family, fatherhood, motherhood, athleticism, discipline, achievement, entrepreneurship, teamwork, leadership, and friendship — all the things that surpass materialism and fame.

So, let’s take note of what matters… what makes us tick day-to-day. We don’t get to let up on that outpour. If anything, tragedy should encourage us to increase Love to maximum levels. Could any of us leave Earth at any moment? Sure, but more importantly, we have the gift of family, friends, and networks that can house incredible memories that outlive our mortality. We have passions that could leave a perpetual imprint on the world.

Make your mark, Sweetheart. Savor opportunities to create meaningful relationships. Capture moments to love on people. Pause to admire God’s handiwork. Do random acts of kindness. It’s not about beating the clock of death; it’s about expanding and producing within the time you have. I, for one, plan to continue that mission.

Peace, Blessings, and Thanks for listening! Let’s go!

Ephesians3.19
Bible verse image courtesy of YouVersion

Wednesday Wind Down: Produce

Hello, Sweethearts!

We made it through another week, didn’t we? What a blessing! We’re 15 days into 2020 and the new year is going fast!

While walking my dog this week (which seems to be my secondary #LATSOL hotspot nowadays), I thought about Jennifer Lopez. I had just binge-watched Hustlers and Second Act, and being a long-term supporter of J. Lo, I imagined how she must have felt after producing these two films… pride, relief, and excitement. She’s known for not putting her name on anything she does not fully endorse and she exudes excellence in every mission set before her. In her words, she doesn’t see herself as getting older — she just strives to be a better version of herself year after year.

With that said, I pulled a virtual chair next to Ms. Lopez and I kicked my feet up for a split-second. We recalled her body of work on stage, on screen, and behind the camera. She has and continues to produce a broad spectrum of art. We nodded in approval as photos of movie posters circulated in front of us like a carousel of colorful horses.  Then, I absorbed the lesson of the moment.

Be proud of everything you produce.

Now, that’s a tall order, but it is definitely doable. You see, we are soil. God created us out of dirt (just take a look in the tub next time for verification), but I believe we host spiritual soil inside of us. It is capable of growing amazing things because everything God made can produce something. That’s the God-like quality in us — to produce inanimate creations like music and lively humans called babies. Part of the reason I appreciate the prowess of Jennifer Lopez is because she is always proud of her work… her produce… the fruit of her labor. How many of us can say the same thing?

So, if we’re the soil, where are the seeds? Where’s the light? Who’s got the water? I’m glad you asked! We host seeds from various places. They’re a special blend of our parents and our experiences. All of them have a chance to grow, but the goal is to produce the best fruit we have to offer the world before we leave here. With Light from the Word of God and a flow of guidance (Water) from the Holy Spirit to nourish us daily, we can produce exceptional things in this life. And let’s not forget Love… that beautifully gritty fertilizer.

Need some help getting started? Here’s a few verses for your journey.

Matt 5.16Galatians 6.10Hebrews 10.242 Cor 9.6

My prayer is to die empty and I can only do that if my soil produces fruit that I am proud to present to my Father and to His Creations. The beauty of it all is that I have this remarkable opportunity every day.  So do you.

What are you producing, Sweetheart?

Peace & I’m praying for the soil of your heart. Thanks for listening!

Bible verse visuals courtesy of my YouVersion Bible App

Wednesday Wind Down: Upon Deaf Ears

Good Evening, Sweethearts!

It’s been a week since the decade started. How’s it going? Are you smashing those goals? So far, so good on mine. *fist bump* Here’s some motivation for your week as you continue to shine.

The new year usually causes people to purge their homes, phone contacts, and Facebook friends. Many Christians participate in a fast to gain spiritual strength and clarity. People around the world undergo a new exercise regimen to improve their health (or to unveil a new summer body — whatever works). As I was talking to a friend about fasting, I heard God’s voice clearly and created a great reminder for me.

Pride is deaf to everything except its own voice.

photo of a boy listening in headphones
Photo by jonas mohamadi on Pexels.com

As you’re in the midst of de-cluttering your life and increasing your awesomeness, I encourage you to be mindful of those that are deaf to your concerns, desires, and goals. Have you tried more than once to change the lenses in someone else’s glasses? You expose the gears of your soul and be straightforward with your expectations, but s/he still doesn’t get it. No matter what you say, there’s a negativity belt that suffocates your pursuit of purpose all the while their own version of truth is on repeat in their ears. If you’ve said all you can say and changed your behaviors for the better and the message is still “return to sender,” be encouraged to be just as deaf as they are. What you may be experiencing is their pride plugging their ears to the Truth. The bad news is you don’t get to control their hearing. Go ahead. Let that sink in.

Since your words fall upon their deaf pride, I suggest you allow their pride to fall upon your deaf positivity. Talking to someone who doesn’t listen is frustrating and exhausting. I have learned to plug my ears with what God’s Word says about me. The negativity, the disregard, the ego… it all bounces off my spiritual earplugs. You too have the option to receive or deny what someone tries to put on your plate. Don’t let the manifestations of their pride stick to your progress. It’s a new year, so don’t back down. Keep going walking toward the best version of yourself. Honestly, you don’t have time for anything else.

Remember: Be mindful of what you see and hear because it can determine what you say and do. You control what germinates in your spirit, so let their pride fall on your deaf ears. Here’s a visual of Philippians 4:8 to help you along the way.

Phil 4.8

Peace & Thanks for listening. I’m praying for you. Have a great week!

Wednesday Wind Down: DNA

Hi, Sweethearts!

I had a thought this week and I hope it encourages you as it did me. I always say that what’s in you will come out of you. Let’s look at that from a biological perspective.

The famous double-helix of deoxyribonucleic acid. It’s a pretty cool construction of genetic material. Some genes are prominent while others seemingly appear out of nowhere such as eye and hair colors. Genes can also remain recessive and others express themselves loudly and proudly. Remember that Punnett square from biology class? That was one of my favorites in school.

punnett square khan academy
Courtesy of Khan Academy

Speaking of dominant vs. recessive, I recall times in class when I knew the answer but was discouraged to share it. You know how it is… it is easier to blend into academic cultures if you don’t seem like a know-it-all. How unfortunate that I was coerced to snuff my intellect to make my classmates and teachers feel more comfortable. I was ridiculously shy and my comfort in learning was never intended to create a shadow on those who I hoped to be friends with at some point in childhood. I felt that I studied the content, did the homework, and came prepared to share it with others. I just didn’t understand why they were so reluctant to share their thoughts too. What they didn’t know was that I was always nervous. Always afraid that I would be misunderstood. I also didn’t like the teacher standing there wanting someone to just show some effort and looking disappointed at the silence. Then came math class — my nemesis. I wasn’t so excited to share in that arena. I felt dumb and inadequate, but I still tried to express my desire to learn. After all, I still studied the content and still did the homework; I just wasn’t good at it, but I wanted the teacher to see that I tried. The life lesson I gleaned from my childhood was that dousing my abilities cost me peace. The less I allowed God to simply shine through who He made me to be, the more unrest and insecurity I experienced.

This week, God brought that back to my remembrance. The heaviness of hiding is such a difficult cloak to wear. God made us so beautifully different that it would be a discredit to his creativity to be anything else than yourself. Taking it a step further — my faith is part of my spiritual DNA. When Jesus died for me, His blood provided all the divine genetic material I need to walk confidently in faith. Sweethearts, allow your spiritual DNA to shine through just as strong as your natural one. Whether you’re a science wiz, nail polish lover, or welding enthusiast… be that. Own that. Flourish in that. If your spiritual gifts include hospitality, prayer, or influence… walk in that. Flourish in that too. Time’s up for decreasing what makes you exceptional.

I believe God’s grace is in my DNA. His loving fingerprints are all over my soul and I am unapologetic about that Truth. My chocolate skin can’t hide herself. My tone and texture are distinctive to my vocal cords. My faith has expressive DNA as well. I’ve been through the rounds and my scars have created a battle cry that I can’t suppress. So, oh well, if it makes others uncomfortable. I can not sit quietly when I know the Answer… and His name is Jesus.

Peace & Thanks for listening. I’m praying for you during this holiday season.

#bloglikecrazy: Peep My Prayers #21

Prayer: “God, you gotta help me get rid of this. It’s eating me alive.”

Bitterness is such a tricky thing. First, it seduces you like a delectable dessert. With every bite, it becomes part of your spiritual DNA… infecting the entrails of your common sense. You become infused with anger as it dilutes your happiness. Its roots take hold of every good thing that has happened to you and you become a hostage in your own skin. The bars seemed passion-retardant and kindness-resistant. On the outside, you’re doing fine but on the inside, you’re a caged phoenix.

That’s what a particular season of bitterness had done to me and I had finally reached the point where I could admit it. And I was bitter for a good reason if you ask me. A viable reason. One-hundred-percent-not-my-fault reason… but I was only one harboring the storm in my spirit while the offender seemed to frolic in a sea of Dutch tulips.

During my prayer, the words didn’t sound right to me and I’m so glad it didn’t matter. I let them out anyway. All I knew was I felt like I was choking in the vomit of my pain and I couldn’t take it anymore… and He heard me. I would be lying if I said I only dealt with bitterness once in my life. The cool difference about now and then is that I recognize it before that bite. I see it for what it is and I ask God for help much sooner than I used to.

I pray that you do the same. Don’t let it reel you in.

Peace & Thanks for listening, Sweetheart.

#bloglikecrazy: Peep My Prayers #19

Prayer: “Lord, this is so cool. I’m actually here. I’m doing what I love to do. I have no idea how this is going to work out, but I am so grateful for the ride.”

Today marks the one-year anniversary of my massage practice! *insert happy party horn blow here* The day I opened, I had no idea that my school would close in less than a month. So, needless to say, I was ripe for that moment I spoke to you about yesterday. Instead, I felt ready to accept the next chapter of my professional life and spiritual growth even without all of the answers. A lot of entrepreneurs set their sights and prepare their resources for the business ahead and I did that. Unfortunately, the legs were swept from under my colleagues and me in a matter of minutes and my 3-6 month plan to transition into my business came early. Super early.

Nervous? Yes!
Excited? Absolutely!
Wondering how it was going to work out? That too!

Fast forward to the present day and I wake up honored to help my clients, teach dance students, write to you, and rehearse with my Crew. Am I riding in a brand new car, sporting flashy clothes, and sitting in a beach chair every weekend? *insert a loud laugh here — in real life* Completely the opposite. But I remember the seasons when I hated going to work every day and I promised myself that I would not live in professional bitterness until I die. It feels good to eat lunch with my mother or visit a friend more often. It feels lovely when I look at my calendar and I was a choreographer, public speaker, and licensed massage therapist all in one day. I love it. It’s fulfilling and I can’t wait to keep going.

I pray that you reach that point too, Sweetheart. I pray that you will at least write it down so you can see its possibility in your hands. I also pray that you link with God’s divine design in you. Everything about you was meant to make this Earth better than it was before you got here. So, keep the real prayers coming. I’m rootin’ for you.

Peace & Thanks for listening!

#bloglikecrazy: Peep My Prayers #18

Prayer: “Lord, I can’t believe this is happening to me. Why can’t things just go right?!”

My passionate expression probably seems outlandish, childish even, but God knows I’m serious. He knows that I don’t pout at every little thing. I take the brunt of various blows so my friends, family, and teammates do not have to. It’s how I’m wired. Oh, but every now and then, I just have a good old-fashioned fit. I wouldn’t call it a tantrum, but close calls have occurred. The contents of said fit generally include a raw verbal exchange with my Heavenly Father, frustration tears, and deep breathing. Afterward, I usually end up praying words of thanksgiving and leveling up my faith that everything will work out.

Max Lucado calls it “the perfect storm”… the rather imperfectly perfect blend of unfortunate things that could happen all at once. For the most part, I chew up that storm and keep my energy focused on what’s ahead. I channel unnecessary energy to the Truth that there is an end to the misfortune. At times, it just gets too much and I am purely annoyed and frustrated. If I had a fistful of flour, my inclination would be to throw it all over the place. If there was a punching bag, it would ask for mercy… but only for about 2 minutes. Yes, you read correctly. When I need to just get it out, I do and I give myself a time limit to do so. My flustered self may scream, whine, grunt, cry… whatever it takes. Then once it’s out, it’s out. My faith takes over and God reinforces His strength in me and I’m geared up for the fight again.

That “perfect storm” allows God to show Himself strong in me and also in the situation that is trying to smother me at that moment. I’m also crazy enough to believe that He allows me to release the pressure valve if needed. Whenever that is. Without judgment. Without shame. I can go there with Him and I love it.

I pray that you release your real prayer in the midst of your “perfect storm.” Get it out. Say it, breathe through it, and do so unapologetically to your Creator. It’s definitely better out than in.

Peace & Thanks for listening, Sweetheart!

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